Category: The No Asshole Rule

  • The No Asshole Rule: A CEO Presses The Delete Button

    Button I am mostly focused on the upcoming publication of Good Boss, Bad Boss. But I am and will always be the "asshole guy."  I still get a good 20 to 30 emails a week about issues and reactions related to The No Asshole Rule. There are still a lot of people suffering out there and assholes will always be with us.  But I still love a good success story.  Yesterday, I got a lovely one about the role that a rather brave employee — who used the book as ammunition — played in expelling the local certified asshole.  I removed his name but the rest of the email is unchanged.

    Bob,
     
    I ran across your book while I was studying the
    literature on workplace bullying.  As a
    victim myself, a colleague and I had been fighting an asshole Director and a
    Section Head above us for over two years. 
    I actually sought psychological treatment to help me with the emotional
    troubles I was obviously having in this battle.

     
    3 weeks ago I sent your book to our CEO.  He said he'd read it already and sent it
    back.  I met with our HR director at the
    CEO's request and I gave it to him.  This
    led into a meeting with our VP, and I gave him a copy as well.

     
    Today it was announced that this director was fired.
     
    Thanks!

    I am always interested in your notes and comments about The No Asshole
    Rule
    (and anything else) but I confess that success stories are
    especially nice to hear

    P.S. Speaking of The No Asshole Rule, I got a note today that the Asshole Rating Self-Exam (ARSE), our online test to see if you are a certified asshole, is just about to hit 237,000 completions.  It is currently at 236,950. The self-examination continues!

  • Strategic Use of Swearing in the Workplace

    HBR editor Dan McGinn has a great post called Should Leaders Ever Swear? that has generated a lot of comments and is very thoughtful. He ends with a great question "Is it appropriate to use it as a bonding device or a way to motivate
    people? Do smart bosses use the f-bomb as a tool? What do you think?"

    As the author of a book with a mildly dirty title, I have probably thought about this question too much and have blogged about all sorts aspects of it here.  But I guess despite my use of profanity in my book and as a regular part of how I talk (although having children did lead me to swear a lot less at home and everywhere else), I do have some thoughts about Dan's great question:

    1. If you are not sure, don't do it.  There are people who are very offended by what I would think of as even mild obscenities.  As a result of having students pull me aside in early in my career, and ask me not to swear (I swore a lot in class when I was a brand new professor), I now rarely swear unless I am quoting someone when I am teaching executives or Stanford students.   The one big exception is when I say the name of my book, The No Asshole Rule, or teach a session on it, as it is impossible to do it without saying the word "asshole" a lot.

    2. There is a big difference between "backstage" and "front stage" norms.  In many places, swearing is private meetings is fine, but is unwise when you are being observed front stage.  You can see these norms at play if you listen to the amazing tapes made by both Lyndon Johnson and Richard Nixon, as they swore constantly backstage, but not in public.  Of course, you have to be careful not to slip, as when  George Bush — who thought the microphone was off — commented that a New York Times reporter was a "major league asshole" at a campaign rally.

    3. Swearing on rare occasions can be very effective for the shock value.  If you swear constantly, then people will barely notice it.  But when you do it rarely, it can have a big effect.  In fact, this phenomenon helped get me interested in The No Asshole Rule.  Years ago, at my department at Stanford, one of my colleagues — who rarely if ever swears at meetings — had a big impact on our group by arguing that we should not hire a renowned but difficult researcher because we did not want to ruin our group by bringing in "assholes."  From then on, the no asshole rule discussed as a hiring criteria.  I believe that if he was the kind of guy who swore constantly, we never would have heard it.

    4.  The norms of the group or organization are crucial.  I have worked in some places that if you DON'T swear you are looked upon with suspicion because, well, that is how everyone talks and it you don't swear, it means you are not part of the group.  For example, when I was a teenager, my dad owned a company that sold and installed furniture and the like on U.S. Navy ships, and I worked for him now and then.  Everyone in the business swore like crazy, and if you didn't you were seen as an outsider.  Other groups are opposite — I was once pulled aside and told that a CEO was offended by my use of the word "crap" during a speech.  And then there are national differences, as what is clean and innocent in one place may sounds dirty in another. As I blogged here a couple years back, when I was doing PR for The No Asshole Rule on BBC, the presenter told me that saying "asshole" now and then was fine, but she asked me not say "arse" as it would offend many in the UK, especially her mum! 

    5.  Finally, there are times when you may want to offend people.  Perhaps this is my inner asshole speaking, but as I discuss in my chapter on the virtues of assholes, there are occasions where people are incompetent, insensitive, clueless, or mean spirited, that to get their attention and perhaps even to dish out some punishment they deserve, that barrage of angry expletives can be quite effective.  Of course, as a strategy, this should be used in small doses and with proper precautions, but I remain rather proud of a strategic temper tantrum that I aimed at a group of clueless and arrogant Air France employees some years as back. As reported in The No Asshole Rule:

    Consider an experience that my wife Marina,
    our kids Tyler, Claire, and Eve had with Air France
    in the summer of 2005, while we were traveling home from Florence, Italy and had a stopover in Paris. When we arrived at
    the airport in Florence
    ,
    the Air France agent told us that she could not give us a boarding pass for our
    Paris-San Francisco leg (we were later told by another Air France employee that
    she could have, but was “probably just to lazy”).  Our flight to Paris
    was so late we had less than 30 minutes
    to make the long trek through the massive airport, make it through multiple
    security check points, and get five boarding passes
    .

    We made it to the transfer desk with about 15
    minutes to go. There were perhaps eight employees behind the desk, there was no
    line, only employees talking to each other. After spending several minutes
    politely trying to get them to pay attention to our plight, I turned to my wife
    and kids and said, “I have to start yelling at them, I have no choice, I will
    stop as soon as they start helping.” So I just started hollering about how late
    we were, how badly we had already been treated, and that they needed help us right
    now
    . I was really loud and nasty. When they actually started paying
    attention to the problem, they realized how late we were and started
    scrambling. As soon as they started helping, I shut-up, backed away from the
    counter, and apologized to my kids – explaining to them again to them that it
    was a strategic temper tantrum. My calm, nice, and rational wife Marina then
    dealt with them (so there was a bit of good-cop, bad-cop too). They produced
    the boarding passes quickly, pointed at the gate and said, “run as fast as you
    can, and you might make it.” We barely made it, but we did make it.

    I see that I did not mention my swearing during the Air France episode. I definitely dropped some f-bombs, and seem to recall suggesting they were "fucking idiots."  Looking back at this experience, I still have no idea what else I could do to get their attention as they were ignoring us so aggressively. Perhaps screaming at them without swearing would have been equally effective! 

    I am curious about your thoughts on the wisdom of talking dirty, especially the strategic use of foul language.

     

  • Assholes Who Turned Out to Be Right and Other Thoughts About Creative People

    In the fog of my first couple weeks after surgery, I missed some intriguing developments.  Thanks to you folks who read this blog, I got some great emails to help me stay in the loop.  As I was wrestling with my email inbox last night, I found a note from Patrick with a link to a fantastic — troubling, enlightening, and funny — story at cracked.com (which looks to me like a cross between Mad magazine and The Onion, but is more fact-based — they apparently have been around since 1958) on The Five Biggest Assholes Who Ever Turned Out to Be Right, which was posted on April 23rd. 

    I was taken by the post because the author, Dan Seitz, did such a great job of finding people who were annoying, nasty, stubborn, mean-spirited, and otherwise socially inept or personally despicable, but  had championed unpopular but good ideas (or in some cases, ideas that were just different from the prevailing wisdom but they were dismissed because the ideas were advocated by an alleged asshole).  I urge you to read this quite detailed story, where you can learn about the exploits, quirks, and ideas of alleged assholes including baseball player Jose Canseco (he claimed that many stars, including himself, were using steriods, which turned out to be true), scientist  Peter Duesberg (very unpopular because he claimed that AIDS is not caused by HIV, which made him so unpopular that his colleagues and others have — until recently — been ignoring his potentially breakthrough work on the causes of cancer), Harry Markopolos (who admits that he combines the worst characteristics of a math nerd and frat boy — but spent 9 years pressing his accusations that Bernie Madoff was running a Ponzi scheme).  

    My favorite asshole who was right, however, is Fritz astronomer.  See this description from the American Museum of Natural History for more details.   But as Seitz tells us:

     

    21945 To give you an idea of how charming Fritz Zwicky was, when he was
    working at Aerojet, a bunch of customers from the military, including
    two admirals, showed up for an appointment to check on his progress.
    Zwicky met them at the gate demanding that they
    leave
    because they weren't scientists and were therefore absolutely
    unqualified to look at the stuff they were, um, buying. Outside of work,
    his solution to winning arguments was to try and punch people, which
    was mostly found adorable because he was a little old man who could be
    pummeled easily. It became less adorable when he said things like "I myself can think of a
    dozen ways to annihilate all living beings in one hour," and his
    scientific partner was afraid Zwicky was out to kill him.

    BUT he was right in serious ways, even though it took decades  for his colleagues to find that out because they thought these were just wacky ideas from "Crazy Fritz" (pictured to the left).  As Seitz tells it:

    Needless to say, the whole "total lack of people skills" thing made
    him so popular and beloved he got the nickname "Crazy Fritz." So it was
    easy to ignore Zwicky while he was off doing crazy things like inventing
    most of modern astronomy.

    The term "supernova"? He invented it.

    Plus:

    He also developed the theory that allows us to know how old the
    universe is. Dark matter? He was among the first to theorize about it.
    Gravitational lensing, i.e. using stars to look at other stars? He laid
    out the theory 40 years before it was actually proved correct. Zwicky was so ahead of his time, and so annoying, that it was
    basically routine in the 70s to say "Yeah, Fritz Zwicky thought of this
    40 years ago but nobody took him seriously because he was a crazy
    douche
    ."

    Stories like these, especially the one about Fritz, are important to remember because — although people who are stubborn, trample over everyone else, are unable or unwilling to use the most basic social graces, and treat others like dirt clearly deserve to be called assholes and may not be worth the trouble no matter how brilliant they are — they are less burdened than most of us by pressures to think like everyone else. They may be  in a better position, as the first scientist to isolate Vitamin C — Albert Szent-Gyorgi — famously suggested (I am paraphrasing),  "To look at the same thing as everyone else, but to think of and see something different."  

    I wrote a lot about people with this talent in Weird Ideas That Work, especially in the chapter on "slow learners."  I would also add, however, that there are many people who think for themselves and stubbornly stick to unpopular ideas regardless of social pressures and prevailing wisdom, but aren't assholes.  A good example was Nobel Prize winner Richard Feynman, who did irritate people by pushing ideas they disagreed with, but was known as usually charming and well-loved.  He won a  Nobel Prize on Physics and many experts believe he deserved one, possibly two, others (e.g., Feynman solved a problem that another researcher won another Nobel for years later — but the paper with the solution just sat in his drawer for many years because he never got around to sending the paper to an academic journal).

    He also "went rogue" as member of the Rogers Commission that investigated the explosion of the Challenger Space Shuttle — and despite pressures to stop from the head of it — did his own interviews with NASA scientists and engineers that led him to believe that the explosion was caused by O-rings that failed under cold temperatures.   If you have never seen it, his demonstration to congress (which some members of the commission tried to stop) that when an O-ring was put in beaker of cold water, it became brittle and more likely to break, was the pivotal moment in the investigation — it is a beautiful example of breaking down a problem to its esssence. Feynman's role on the Rogers Commission is instructive because, although he fought with the head of the commission William Rogers about the independent action he took and was famously called "a real pain" by Rogers, he wasn't doing it to be an asshole. He was doing to get to the truth.  Rogers probably thought he was an asshole, which reminds me that it is label that people should hesitate to use and accept as true, because it is often applied simply to people who disagree with us, are more successful than us, or who simply act or think differently than than us. 

    If you are in a group or organization where people who simply look, think, or act differently than everyone else are labeled as assholes, and the best you can be is a perfect imitation of everyone else around you, well, the odds are no one is thinking very much and there isn't much original thinking going on.

    In short, although being oblivious or indifferent (or naive, by the way) to what others thing can help people see and develop new ideas (and is a hallmark of assholes at times), I think it is important to keep in mind that not all original thinkers are assholes (the trick is to see things differently and not to cave in when people don't like your "different ideas").  I should also point out that not all assholes are original thinkers.  There are plenty of mean-spirited jerks out there who mindlessly follow the crowd and are incapable of original thinking.  

    P.S. Also note that the post at Cracked reminds us of another cost that assholes inflict on themselves and others — if you are branded as an asshole, people are more likely to reject your ideas, even if they are right.  The negative reactions they have to YOU color their reactions to your ideas.  One solution, by the way, is if you are an asshole with good ideas, you might work with a more socially adept partner who is more skilled at selling your ideas.

  • Craig Ferguson’s Intriguing Joke: Does Every Group Have at Least One Asshole?

    In The No Asshole Rule, I make a tentative argument that it might be better to have one token asshole in a group (rather than none) to show others how NOT to behave — a suggestion supported by some behavioral science research, especially studies on littering that show people are less likely litter into a setting that has one piece of garbage than none at all (apparently because the one bad example makes the norm against littering  more vivid).  Frankly, I was not sure about the wisdom of this argument then, and am even am less sure of now.  The reason I am less sure now (although I do have examples where a single token asshole was used by colleagues to remind themselves how not to behave) is that negative emotions and behaviors pack such a big wallop and are so contagious that the speed at which the negativity can spread from the token asshole to everyone else means this is can be a dangerous practice.

    This all sets the stage for an old joke.  I think I first heard it from Craig Ferguson, the late night talk show host:

    Every group has an asshole. If you look around and don't see one, that means it is you.

    I think that is as good an asshole joke as I have heard.   Perhaps it is funny because it is true — it is consistent with research showing that we humans are remarkably oblivious to our flaws.  In particular, this  joke is instructive for bosses because power is so toxic and so many bosses are so oblivious to their asshole ways.

  • The No Asshole Rule: A Useful Book Even For People Who Don’t Read It?

    This September, I will be publishing a new book called Good Boss, Bad Boss: How to be the best… and learn from the worst, which I will introduce here in some detail here very soon (It was just posted on Amazon and can be pre-ordered; but I am going to wait a few days before writing about in part because they have a few things to fix on the page with both the image and the text). I also have a paperback version of The No Asshole Rule that will be published at the same time, which includes a new chapter, an Epilogue, called "On Being that Asshole Guy."  The paperback isn't even available for pre-order yet.  And  I will talk more about the new chapter as we get closer to launch and it is available to order.  But I can say that I had a huge amount of fun writing the new chapter and got into it so much that neither I nor my editor could quite believe it. 

    When I began the chapter, our agreement was that it run a short 3000 words. Yet once I started digging through the highlights and thinking of all I had learned from being the asshole guy, I realized that there was no way that 3000 words was enough and my editor agreed when he saw the first draft. So the new chapter will be about 7500 words — I think the first draft was in the 10,000 word range.  I started by re-reading the emails people sent me — I dug up about 3000.  I was simply astounded by the range, quantity, and especially the quality. I went back and re-read all the pertinent blog posts here, and more generally used it as an opportunity to think about what I learned from one of the weirdest and most enlightening experiences of my professional life.

    One of the many odd things that struck me as I reflected on the experience was that I had written a book that many people claimed was remarkably useful, even though they hadn't read it. As an author, I confess that this insight still disturbs me both because I worked so hard on every sentence in the book and, well, I want people to spend the money to buy my book.  Here is what I said about this insight in the new chapter (note that a word here and there might be different in the final version):

    I
    believe the title struck such a nerve is because, for most people, the A-word
    captures the emotional and tangible elements of working with, managing, and
    being these destructive characters so well — indeed, people who haven’t read a
    page make remarkably accurate guesses about the contents.  This is
    disconcerting because, after all, I devoted a big hunk of my life to
    researching, writing, and editing these words.   Mark Twain defined a
    “classic” as “a book which people praise and don't read.”  The No Asshole
    Rule
    isn’t a classic, but takes Twain’s point further by being a book that
    people can understand pretty well without reading.   There are other
    reasons the book is useful to those who don’t read it. An attorney explained
    that although she had not read it yet, she displayed a copy prominently in her
    office – and pointed to it when one of her colleagues started turning nasty. 
    An executive from a large internet company told me a similar story
    recently.  He claimed to have read it and liked it, but said it was most
    useful as a protective device.  People saw it on his desk, which reminded
    them to be civil, and “When they do lose it, I hold it up in front of my face
    like a shield – they get the message and turn it down immediately.”

    I also know leaders who haven't read the book, but still use it to help enforce the rule. The leaders of several professional
    services firms discussed the book with me and explained they use the rule to
    help set their partners’ salaries – especially to justify paying less to top
    earners who are all-star assholes. At one firm, the lead partner waved the book
    around as he announced the rule would be used in compensation decisions.
    A
    couple years later, he told me it was working so well that he really ought to
    read it!  Copies of the book have also been used as symbolic weapons
    against asshole bosses.  In 2008, I gave a talk on the Stanford campus to
    several hundred leaders of nonprofit organization
    s. Afterwards, a
    vice-president from one non-profit pulled me aside and told me how they finally
    got their abusive CEO sacked.  The senior team (sans CEO) met with the
    board of directors, gave them each a copy of the book, and all threatened to
    resign if the CEO was not removed immediately.  The board voted to fire
    the CEO later that day.

    I still think this is pretty weird, but I have accepted it as just one more twist in The No Asshole Rule story.  If you have any other ideas or stories about how the book can be used to good — or I suppose bad — effect even by people who don't read or buy it, I would be most curious to hear.

  • Nice Article in WSJ on Banishing Office Jerks, But They Seem Afraid to Say “Asshole”

    A few weeks back, just before my surgery, I was interviewed by Sue Shellenbarger of the the Wall Street Journal about an article she was doing on workplace jerks and their management.  The article on Banishing the Office Jerks appeared today, and I must say — after reading hundreds of these things over the last few years — this is one of the very best.  It focuses particularly on  Lars Dalgaard, the CEO of HR software firm SuccessFactors.  I have written about Lars and his firm's "no jerks" rule several times, including here and here (they used to call it "no assholes," but cleaned it up right about the time they went public).  I am glad that I introduced Sue to Lars.  He admits that he was an workplace jerk early in his career,  As I suggested to Sue when I told her about Lars, one of the things I admire most about him is that in a world where most executives are so guarded and so defensive that it is difficult to understand what the hell they are actually saying, Lars tells the truth.  (Indeed, as I was watching the Goldman executives testify to congress yesterday, I realized that — no doubt with help from their lawyers — they seemed to have mastered the art of talking on and on without ever actually conveying any content.)  I have talked to Lars about how he sees himself as a recovering asshole before, but I was struck to see how, in the article, he traced it back to family dynamics when he was growing-up (a topic that people who study workplace assholes rarely touch on): 

    He has since realized that an old family pattern was at work, he says.
    His father was so tough and blunt with him when he was small that he was
    behaving the same way with others, trying to be "the hero CEO, the
    Rambo" who ignored people's feelings. Now that he is conscious of the
    problem, he says he has changed his ways. He has even instituted a
    "no-jerks" policy at his company, banning similar behavior by others.

    I was also pleased to see that Sue included a bit of information about another one of my favorite executives, Paul Purcell of Baird, who as I have written here before credits his firm's no asshole rule for both its civilized culture (it keeps rising on Fortune's best place to work list) and also credits it for helping Baird — a financial services firm — grow stronger during financial meltdown.  I write a fair amount about Paul and Baird in my next book, Good Boss, Bad Boss, as I find him one of the most impressive CEOs around in terms of his ability to build a culture that strikes a healthy balance between humanity and performance.  I was interested to see that Sue reported:

    Paul Purcell, chairman, president and chief executive, estimates he has fired more than 25 offenders in the last five years,
    including people who "hurt and belittle other people," or who put their
    own interests ahead of clients or the firm. When he speaks to groups of
    prospective recruits, he warns them: If you're a jerk, "don't come,
    because we'll figure it out. It will be worse for you than it is for
    us.
    "

    A final little point, Sue writes that Baird "has a no jerks rule."  That is actually a bit inaccurate.  As the Fortune story makes clear, they call it The No Asshole Rule at Baird.  Apparently, although the WSJ had enough courage to write out the name of my book once or twice a few years back, and called it the The No A——- Rule on their bestseller list, they have lost their nerve again as they not only censor Baird's rule, they described me as "an author of a book on bad workplace behavior."  Oh well, I am more optimistic that they will spell out the name of my next book,  as Good Boss, Bad Boss is very clean title.

    My whining about censorship aside, check out the WSJ article, it is excellent.

  • His ARSE Score Dropped from 12 to 2: More Evidence That Asshole Poisoning is Contagious

    One of the main themes in The No Asshole Rule is that, if you work with a bunch of mean-spirited creeps, it is very difficult to avoid catching these "adult cooties."  There are at least two reasons this happens.  The first is that a pile of studies show that emotions and behavior patterns are remarkably contagious — that without realizing it, we mimic the way that people around us act.  The second reason is self-preservation: If you work with a bunch of nasty creeps who put you down all the time, treat you as if you are invisible, bad-mouth you, and tease you in hostile ways, sometimes the only way to protect yourself (for better or worse) is to return fire.   These points are supported by academic research, especially the one about emotional contagion.

    Yet it is always fascinating to see how this stuff plays out in the real world. I got an intriguing email the other day from a fellow (who had written me a second time) to report a big drop in his ARSE (Asshole Rating Self-Exam) score after leaving an asshole-infested workplace and moving to a civilized one.  Here is his email, with names of companies and people removed:

    Hi Bob,
    I sent you
    an email several years back (I believe around March 2008) when I left a
    horribly poisonous company after less than 3 months of employment.

    Since then I
    have started with [an energy company].  Very different environment. It's not
    Shangri-la but it's definitely a more positive workplace.

    When I was
    working for [the horribly poisonous company ] I had taken the ARSE exam and scored a 12 (after answering
    honestly). Today, I retook the test (answering honestly again) and scored a 2.
    I've sent the test to others in my work group and asked them to give me their
    test scores. The highest score was a 6.


    I also find
    myself much more productive and spend most of my time working on how to achieve
    the group's goals instead of how to protect mysel
    f
    .

    This story also reinforces a point I make over and over again on this blog and every other place I write and speak: If you are in an asshole-infested work group or organization, the best thing you can do is to get out as fast as you can.  Yes, there are ways to limit the damage, fight back, and to make changes — but they don't always work, and even when they do, you can suffer a lot of damage in the process.

  • The Meanest Bartender in San Francisco

    At this point, we certainly don't need any additional evidence that people get VERY worked-up about assholes, but I can't resist this fantastic post on SF Gate (the San Francisco Chronicle website) by Harmon Leon on "Who are the meanest bartenders in San Francisco?"  The best part is the comments, a whopping 468 for a rather sleepy part of blogging universe.  This post is brilliant and very funny.  For example, consider this excerpt:

    The award for the all time meanest bartenders in San Francisco has got
    to go to the crew at the
    Zeitgeist.
    Besides scowling things like, "F-ing yuppies," if someone with a shirt
    with buttons orders a drink, there is always an unpleasant sort of
    life-has-kicked-them-in-the-nuts, unhealthy tweaker vibe when you when
    you try to order a drink.

    One time the bartender threw my change at me because I left her 4
    quarters as a tip for a beer. (That still equals a dollar, right?)
    Serious issues. Extra points for the bouncer always doing my favorite
    non-ironic, closing time speech: "Last call! Drink `em up! You don't
    have to go home BUT YOU CAN'T STAY HERE
    !"

    I love this, it reminds of a now long dead but famous San Francisco waiter Edsel Ford Fong who was the star attraction at rather mediocre Chinese restaurant.  You went there for his brilliant and funny insults.. I once asked him for a fork, which he turned into a public shaming ritual as he made me walk and get it myself while he taunted me for my disrespect of him, his restaurant, and all Chinese people on the planet.  He is immortalized  at the San Francisco Giants lovely ballpark, where there is a Chinese restaurant named Edsel Ford Fong.

    Under the right conditions, a professional asshole can be a lot of fun. 

  • I Call Them Adult Cooties

    I am putting the finishing touches on a new chapter of The No Asshole Rule that will appear in the paperback edition of the book, which will be published in September. The title of the chapter (which looks like it will persist) is "On Being the Asshole Guy."  To help write the chapter, I have been re-reading thousands of emails and comments on this blog.  I thought you might like the line that I use a title for this post.  It came in an email from a pastor in Georgia, who asked "Do You Study Churches?"  She went on express concern that the nasty and petty parishioners were turning her mean:

    I entered a toxic
    environment and I too have fallen for being an asshole (actually I call them
    the 'adult cooties').  I am trying to turn around and be more sensitive,
    especially as I tend to stress my secretary rather than kick my dog
    .

    As we've seen here many times, nastiness is a contagious disease, even for priests, ministers, and rabbis — after all, they are just human being like the rest of us.   But I love her phrase "adult cooties."  

    P.S. The paperback edition of The No Asshole Rule will be released in conjunction with my new book, Good Boss, Bad Boss: How to be the best… and learn from the worst."  I will begin blogging about that in the next couple weeks.