Category: The No Asshole Rule

  • The Audi and the Asshole

    The ARSE test has provoked a new round of "asshole stories," especially about asshole bosses. Leslie at Burns Auto Parts Consulting  wrote a great post that asks "Are You an Asshole?  Note that Leslie isn’t a car parts designer, she is a photographer and consults to people who do creative work… she just uses cars as a metaphor for what she does.

    Leslie’s story abut the asshole boss and the Audi shows to me — although surveys and the like are useful — that there are just some things that assholes do that can only be captured through stories, not by checking boxes that say "true" and "false" or 1 to 5 (although the best of all is to combine stories with quantitative data). Check out her full post, but the themes I see running through reflect the nasty things that happen to people when you give them a little power, like :

    I personally had a boss (owner) who told his workers
    (about 6 of us) that there needed to be “belt-tightening” in the
    company. We all needed to “pull together” to get through the financial
    bad times, and vague promises of profit sharing in the future were
    offered. A few days later he showed up with (and showed off!) his new
    Audi. Interesting that he lost two key players (including me) not long
    after that.

    I think that is a clear asshole move and this boss qualifies as an asshole — and it is consistent with that research on power dynamics that shows how, once people get in positions of power, they focus on satisfying their own needs and wants and become insensitive to the the perspective and feelings of others. I would also add, however, that Leslie’s boss might have been an asshole, but he was an amateur compared to the salesman who wrote me "Had Lukemia, Bullied by a Bad Manager."

  • ARSE Statistics: Assholes are on the Upswing

    Michael Lehmkuhl from Electric Pulp just mailed-in some stats
    on the Asshole Rating
    Self-Exam (ARSE)
    :

    Monday, February 5th:  2432 people completed it with an average score
    of 5.44860.

    Tuesday February 6th: So far today, 3469
    people completed it with an average score of 7.25483.

    Michael concludes: “So today more people are assholes than yesterday.”

  • The Button for the ARSE Test

    Better_button
    This button is the perfect companion to the ARSE test.  The purpose of this self-test is to find-out if you are a certified asshole, at risk of becoming one, or a genuinely civilized person. In other words, it can help you come to grips with the fact that you are — or are fast becoming — a demeaning jerk and that it just might be time to do something about it!

    To be a bit more serious, the best way to use the test is probably not just to take yourself, but to get key people in your social network to complete it about you — you boss, peers, subordinates, customers, and perhaps your wife, husband, friends, and lovers. 

  • Are You an ARSE? Take the Test!

    I worked with Guy Kawasaki and the folks from Electric Pulp to develop the Asshole Rating Self Exam, or  ARSE test, based on the The No Asshole Rule: Building a Civilized Workplace and Surviving One That Isn’t.   Check out Guy’s post on the test, his review of book, and take the 24-item ARSE test yourself — and see if you are a certified asshole. Or perhaps there is that special someone you know who needs to take the test.

  • “Be Cool” by Jazz Musician Christian McBride

    If you want some compelling words that can help you keep your inner jerk in check and perhaps live a longer and happier life, check out the recent "This I Believe" segment on NPR by jazz musician Christian McBride. It is called "Be Cool" and starts out:

    I believe people have become tighter, meaner and less tolerant than
    ever. I never remember people being so uncool. I don’t remember people
    getting the third degree because they decided to wear brown shoes
    instead of black. If you get too close to someone on the road, they
    want to get out and shoot you for possibly hitting their car. What’s
    wrong with these people?

                            

    I believe it
    pays to be cool. Most people in this day and age are always terribly
    stressed and hypersensitive to absolutely everything. They will age
    quickly. Cool people stay young forever.

    You can read it or listen to it at this link. I strongly recommend that you take a few minutes to listen, Mr. McBride speaks in a mighty compelling way.

  • Asshole Revenge Stories: “Oh, He Is Going To LA But His Luggage Is Going To Nairobi”

    One of the things
    that surprised me when I published my initial Harvard Business Review  essay on The No Asshole Rule in 2004 (it was called “More Trouble Than They
    Are Worth”) was how many revenge stories it provoked. I read dozens in the emails that started
    pouring-in and heard many more in the conversations that I had with people
    about their struggles with bosses, co-workers, and clients that robbed them of
    their dignity and esteem.

    I have already
    blogged about the radio producer who extracted
    revenge from her food-stealing boss
    by making some candies out of Ex-Lax
    and leaving them on her desk, which he promptly ate, as always, without her
    permission – and then suffered the consequences. I also heard a great story from Jason Zweig, who writes for Money Magazine.  Jason told me about how, some years back,
    he was standing behind an irate passenger at the the check-in line in 
    New York. Jason
    described how the passenger went on and on insulting the airline employee, and
    how impressed he was at her ability to remain cool, calm, and professional in
    the face of such abuse.  Jason told me,
    and confirmed later over e-mail, that although it was years ago, ‘It is her words that have stuck forever in my memory:
    "Oh, he’s going to [L.A.], but his luggage is going to Nairobi" —
    and the faint but unmistakable firmness in her smile that made me realize, half
    with a chill and half with a thrill, that she wasn’t kidding.’
    Let that
    be a lesson to the nasty passengers out there, if the airlines keep losing your
    luggage it may reflect something about you, not about their system!

    I have dozens of
    other revenge stories. I heard one of my favorites years ago from Susan Schurman, who I
    wrote a research paper with when we were both Ph.D students at The University
    of Michigan. Sue is now president of the 
    National  Labor College in Silver Springs Maryland.
    Sue worked for several years as a bus driver  in Ann  Arbor, Michigan

    in the 1970s, where she eventually became a union leader. Even in a relatively small city like Ann Arbor,
    drivers constantly tangle with aggressive and sometimes hostile
    drivers. Sue told me that, when she took
    rookie drivers under her wing, one of the first things she taught them was that
    a skilled driver “never had an accident that is an
    accident”
    and instead accidents should be “punishments” that bus drivers
    intentionally inflict on “crazy drivers.” She went on to say that city bus drivers were permitted three accidents
    a year without facing disciplinary action, and that she advised new drivers “save one for Christmas time, because that is when all
    the jerks out, and you will want to get back at one of them.”
      Sue won numerous safety awards and had few
    accidents during the years she was a bus driver, but as she recently wrote me, “the delicious thought that you could punish the assholes
    was an important psychological safety valve. The thought alone was sufficient to help you manage your anger.

    Revenge is a
    double-edged sword.  It is dangerous
    because it can escalate conflict. It is dangerous because it can harm people –
    a bus accident can kill someone. It can get you fired – I suspect that airline
    employees who routinely and intentionally send luggage to the wrong country can
    get in big trouble.  And it is dangerous because
    it can start a vicious circle of asshole poisoning where the warring parties
    continue to hurl nasty insults and actions back and forth to “get even.”

    But there are two intertwined
    ways that revenge can help people who are victimized by assholes. First,
    especially if the tormentor is more powerful than the victim, it is a way to
    fight back.  That producer had the courage
    to do it directly, and I suspect that her boss never ate anything off her desk
    again.  In other cases, it is a way to
    gain a bit of control against a nasty person that can’t be confronted directly –-
    so although that abused airline employee didn’t feel it was wise to fight back
    directly, her act of revenge helped her gain a bit of control. And it was a way that she could communicate
    to Jason Zweig that, although she looked like a doormat, she had both the power
    to keep her emotions in check and the
    power to exact revenge against that demeaning passenger.

    Second, think of
    Sue’s comment “the delicious thought that you could
    punish the assholes was an important psychological safety valve.”
    That “delicious
    thought” meant that – although she usually choose not to exercise it – that she
    had the perception of control over assholes, rather than feeling of
    helplessness.  As the classic and
    fantastic research by Martin
    Seligman
    shows, the perception that one has control over negative events in
    our lives is essential for sustaining human well-being, and the feeling of
    helplessness is devastating to human well-being.  Although
    abused bus drivers — or airline employees or any other victim — may only
    occasionally exact revenge from the constant parade of jerks that they face,
    the feeling that they have the power to do it – the almighty perception
    of control — is essential for sustaining their mental health.

    Again, revenge is a
    dangerous tactic that can backfire easily. I also want to emphasize that if you
    are working in a place where you constantly feel abused, the best thing to do for
    your mental and physical health is to get out as quickly as you can, rather
    than to devote your time and emotional energy to coping with one asshole after
    another.  And, in the case of airlines,
    not all employees are stuck as the powerless victims of asshole customers.  As Ann Rhoades reports about
    JetBlue – she is founding head of HR and now serves on their board of directors
    – they maintain an “uninvited to fly list” and something that they call the “yellow” list, which is a less formal
    list of nasty passengers that may need to be moved to the “uninvited” list if
    their behavior persists or degenerates further. In such a system, employees can
    complain about nasty customers and, in cases where passengers have proven to be persistent and flaming assholes, get them banned.

  • Are You a Certified Asshole? Take the ARSE Test on Monday at Guy’s Blog

    Guy Kawasaki posted a funny and detailed early review of The No Asshole Rule last Fall.  Now, with the book just a few weeks away, Guy and I been working with the great people at Electric Pulp to develop an online version of the "self-test" that appears in the book. So if you want to answer the question "Are You a Certified Asshole," drop by Guy’s rollicking blog How to Change the World on Monday. I just took it myself — I won’t tell how I did, but I well confess that I am not following the principles in The Power of Nice as often as I should.

    Update: Guy. my wife, and the folks at Electric Pulp thought it would be fun to come-up with a catchy title for the test. We had a lot of fun barnstorming different titles, including:

    Test of Asshole-iness Online (TAO)
    Online Asshole Test (OAT)
    Sutton’s Asshole Test (SAT)
    Bob Sutton’s Asshole Test (BS-AT)
    Robert’s Asshole Test (RAT)
    ‘Hole-in-oscopy
    The Eclectic Coolaid Asshole Test
    RU1?
    Asshole Status Survey (ASS)
    Asshole Status Self-Test  (ASS-T)
    Certified Asshole Test  (CAT
    Sutton’s Certified  Asshole Test (SCAT)

    These all have their charms, but the winner (in a nod to our friends in the UK) was:

    Asshole Rating Self-Exam (ARSE)

  • It Isn’t Just a Myth, Power Turns People Into Assholes

    We have
    been talking a lot about leadership in my Stanford class on Organizational
    Behavior: An Evidence-based Approach
    .  Last week, we had a pretty
    detailed discussion about how and why putting people into powerful positions
    seems to turn them into selfish jerks.  I was also thinking about power
    earlier today when a German  journalist from Chrimson interviewed me about Der
    Arschloch-Faktor
    .  I was initially amazed that I was being interviewed
    by a religious organization — but the journalist who interviewed my argued
    that the no asshole rule was, indeed, quite consistent with the golden
    rule.  He wrote me that "We are financed by the The Evangelical
    Church in Germany (EKD), and therefore very interested in topics that deal with
    how human-beings interact, since that is what religion is all about."

    I will
    likely blog about religion and the no asshole rule more in a few weeks.
    But today I am going to focus on the question that reporter asked, "Are assholes born or
    made?"   

    I am sure that there are some people who are genetically pre-disposed to be
    nasty and there are some people who — perhaps as a result of emotional and/or
    physical abuse during childhood — turn into assholes. But there is also strong
    evidence that, no matter what our "personality"  is, we all can
    turn into assholes under the wrong conditions.

    Asshole
    poisoning
    as a disease that you catch from others, and I talk a lot about
    that in the book. It is also something that happens — with shocking speed and
    intensity — when people are put in powerful positions. My colleague at the
    Stanford Business School Deborah
    Gurenfeld
    and her colleagues have been studying the effects of power on
    human beings for over years, and the findings are clear: power turns people
    into selfish and insensitive jerks, who act as if the the rules that the rest of
    us have to follow don’t apply to them.

    Perhaps
    the  best quick summary of this research is an article San Francisco
    Chronicle last Fall called on power and its evil effects, The article
    summarizes this large body of research — now hundreds of studies — as
    follows:

    Research
    documents the following characteristics of people with power: They tend to be
    more oblivious to what others think, more likely to pursue the satisfaction of
    their own appetites, poorer judges of other people’s reactions, more likely to
    hold stereotypes, overly optimistic and more likely to take risks.

    It quotes one of Gruenfeld’s main conclusions:

    Disinhibition
    is the very root of power," said Stanford Professor Deborah Gruenfeld, a
    social psychologist who focuses on the study of power. "For most people,
    what we think of as ‘power plays’ aren’t calculated and Machiavellian
    —  they happen at the subconscious level. Many of those internal
    regulators that hold most of us back from bold or bad behavior diminish or
    disappear. When people feel powerful, they stop trying to ‘control themselves.’

    To illustrate how rapidly such dis inhibition can happen, it
    describes the lovely little "cookie study" done by Gruenfeld and her
    colleagues
    :

    One of the simplest and yet most fascinating
    experiments to test the thesis is the "cookie crumbles" experiment.
    Researchers placed college students in groups of three and gave them an
    artificial assignment  —  collaboration on a short policy paper
    about a social issue. They then randomly assigned one of the students to
    evaluate the other two for points that would affect their ability to win a cash
    bonus. Having set up this artificial power hierarchy, researchers then casually
    brought to working trios plates containing five cookies.

    They
    found that not only did the disinhibited "powerful" students eat more
    than their share of the cookies, they were more likely to chew with their
    mouths open and to scatter crumbs over the table.

    The story also includes the personal experience that Gruenfeld often uses to
    start her talks on the effects of power:

    Gruenfeld
    offers a similar example from her career in journalism when she occasionally
    met with Rolling Stone publisher Jann Wenner. She recalls that he routinely
    would swig vodka from a bottle and eat raw onions  —  without ever offering
    to share  —  "and it never even occurred to the rest of us,
    because it was understood that he had the power and we did not."

    The cookie study and the Rolling Stone story are just bits of evidence — this
    pattern is supported by hundreds of studies.  The upshot off all this
    research is that power turns people into insensitive and selfish jerks, so any
    of us who are put in position of power are at risk of asshole poisoning.

    There is also an interesting twist, however, that — if you look at Jim Collins
    findings about Level 5 leaders in Good to Great as well as less
    well-known, but more rigorous academic research —  leaders who who are
    able to avoid the poison, and instead  focus on the needs of the people
    around them, are apparently more likely to lead more effective organizations.

    So there are good reasons to find ways to resist such poison. Some of the best
    ways are to reduce status differences between people at different levels and to
    have as few hierarchical levels as possible.  Another way is to learn how
    to listen more and talk less.

    P.S. The main academic article where that summarizes this research is "Power,
    Approach and Inhibition"
    and was published in the Psychological
    Review
    .  Also check out this study just
    summarized by U.S. News and World Report on how
    power makes it harder for people to see the world from the perspective of
    underlings.

  • Dead Fish on a Keyboard

    Image002_4
    I was interviewed by a journalist from a German magazine called Emotion about Der Arscloch-Faktor.  The interviewer was fun and explained to me that it was a widely read magazine that was similar to Psychology Today in the U.S. The story just came out and is  reprinted above. Unfortunately, I can’t read German, but I think the picture that goes with the story is hysterical.  I would appreciate any information the folks who speak German can give me about the meaning of the picture. I am guessing that Stinkfisch means stinky fish, but even if I am right, there is probably some cultural implication of the word I don’t quite get.  Thanks!

  • Translating “The No Asshole Rule” Into French

    French_cover2_1
    Last month I ran a little contest to help get some suggestions about what to call my book in Spanish, and I got a lot of suggestions.  In fact, the one from Diego Rodriguez and his uncle Valentin was so detailed and fascinating that I turned it into another post. I haven’t heard back from my Spanish publisher on what they ultimately decided to pick, but I did hear from Geoff Staines and Marie-Pierre Vaslet at my French publisher, Vuibert, which will be publishing the book in April.

    They decided to call it "Objectif Zéro-Sale-Con." I love the clean cover and think they did a great job with the button.  And just as with the Spanish edition, the conversation about how the title evolved was fascinating and funny. Geoff Staines explains:

    The literal translation of asshole is "trou du cul", a form
    of endearment generously employed throughout the French-speaking world, but
    during an impromptu Vuibert seminar on the subject its meaning was felt to be
    halfway between sneak and jerk, besides which it is not used in relation to
    women. The very commonly used "con", in many ways the natural choice, usually
    means plain stupid and lacks the disruptive/destructive/mean-minded nuance. The
    more selective expression "sale con", however, does it all because the qualifier
    "sale" (dirty) emphasises the intentional nature of the con-ness. And as for
    "zéro" instead of "règle" (rule) or "facteur" (which means factor but also
    postman), we went for it because it harks back, amongst other things, to "zéro
    défaut" (from the quality circles’  elimination of faults).

    And Marie-Pierre Vaslet echoed a similar argument, and added some interesting tidbits:

    I was very interested by what you say in your blog about the Spanish
    translation. We had the same problem but I hope we found a solution. In French,
    the exact word for "asshole" is "trou du cul," but it is rather less usual
    than in English, and quite rare to say about a woman. So we choose "sale con,"
    which is very very usual, and we think it has quite the same meaning as "asshole" in English……

    To translate the other part of
    the title (the no…rule), we choose "Objectif zéro-sale-con." The expression "objectif zéro…" (defet, stock, etc.) was employed in French business books
    titles a few years ago (and even now) and we found amusing to make this
    reference when talking about "sales cons."

    Unlike the Spanish version, the title is set, but I still am most interested to hear from people who speak French, especially anyone in France, about their reactions to the title.  I don’t necessarily expect agreement and approval, and I always love the arguments about what to call the book.

    P.S. These arguments aren’t just about the translation from English to other languages, it seems that there are also arguments about the right translation from American to English. See this posting by Richard Donkin on Let Call the Whole Thing Orf.