Category: The No Asshole Rule

This story is from The Onion of course, which also has commented on asshole research.

Thanks to Diego and Rick for pointing this out.

I just got a great email from Rod, who
after a compelling discussion of the differences between good and bad bosses,
added “A college friend of mine was a member of the Comanche nation
and he had a saying for bullshitters and assholes: he called them Walking
Eagles because they were so full of shit that they were too heavy to fly.”

I love that. Better than “all hat, no cattle.”
Enjoy the holidays.

I got a great email the other day about how a police officer used The No Asshole Rule against his boss.  A few identifying facts are removed to protect the innocent and the guilty, but the rest is left untouched.

 I am a Police Officer in Texas. I was given your book by my
supervisor to read so we could ”discuss” leadership idea. I thought this was a
little odd as I could best describe the leadership style of my boss as –
Leadership by oppression. I began to read the book, reluctantly I might add as
I believed he was giving me a not so subtle hint, and realized that he had made
a colossal mistake. The mistake being that not only could the examples of
“assholeness” in the book fit my boss, but it armed me in dealing with him. To
be sure, I did learn ways to keep myself in check with the inner asshole that
sometimes comes out in my line of work. (You are right, sometimes Police are
assholes for a reason.)

The result of reading this book actually had me telling him,
in front of eight of my subordinates that I supervise, that his behavior of
verbally berating Officers was not acceptable on my shift. I actually said to
him “ It’s your fault! You gave me the No Asshole Rule book!
“    Boy it felt good.

I am not quite sure how to add this my list of survival tips, although it sounds like this brave officer has taken an effective step to turn his workplace into one that doesn't tolerate assholes — even ones like his boss who don't seem to realize that they are an asshole.  It reminds me a little of the attorney who displays the book prominently in her office as a hint to her sometimes nasty partners to keep their inner asshole in check with talking with her.

If you have used the book — either the text of just the cover — as defensive weapon, I would love to hear your story.

My Thanksgiving message was about the silver lining that I see in the recent financial troubles, that this is a time when being greedy and selfish is definitely not cool, whether you are a college student or CEO.  That message reminded me that there is an interesting stream of research on gratitude in recent years.  I know, it may sound flaky and new age, but this stuff is based on careful studies by skilled researchers, many of which are controlled experiments with random assignment to conditions. Two of the most active researchers here are Robert Emmons and Michael McCullough, who edited a collection called The Psychology of Gratitude.  Emmons also published Thanks more recently, a practical guide, which was just published in paperback.

The upshot of many of these studies is, regardless of your personality, you can become a healthier and happier person by simply devoting more time and energy to thinking about the good things in your life, the little things for which you are grateful.  For example, A
series of intertwined experiments by Emmons and McCullough
examined “gratitude journals,” where research subjects wrote down at least five
things each day for which they were grateful. 
This modest intervention had measurable effects. Emmons and McCullough found that people who kept such journals enjoyed
superior physical and mental health.  Not
only were they happier than people who weren’t keeping gratitude journals, they
reported fewer physical health problems (e.g., stomach aches, headaches, sore
throats, skin problems), and sleeping more hours and waking up more refreshed
in the morning.  And their spouses or
significant others reported that they were more upbeat, energized, and
satisfied with their lives.

What do you think?  Am I being too mushy, or are the times ripe for gratitude and perhaps a little self-reflection?

 The citation for this study is: Emmons,
R.A., & McCullough, M.E. (2003).  Counting blessings versus burdens:
Experimental studies of gratitude and subjective well-being. Journal of
Personality and Social Psychology, 84, 377-389

P.S. Check out John Lilly's related post, If This Isn't Nice, What Is?

I was not planning on doing a Thanksgiving message, but something dawned on me last night as I thought back to the kinds of things I've been seeing from my colleagues and students at Stanford, the people who write me on this blog, my wife's stories about the Girl Scouts and the needs of under served girls and their families, and what I've been reading in various press reports and stories about the responses to the economic crisis. 

The lost jobs, economic suffering, and fear are terrible things and my heart goes out to all those who are hurt and will be hurt by this mess.  In the Thanksgiving spirit, however, I do see something to be thankful for these days: Being greedy and selfish — doing things for me, me, me and ignoring or exploiting others in the process — is out of fashion.  The current crop of Stanford students are the most socially conscious I have ever encountered during my 25 years here — things like stopping global warming, improving K-12 education, and reducing poverty are seen as what the coolest students do.  And — despite how hard it is to get a job — recruiters will tell you that, to get the best students, they need to demonstrate serious commitment to these and related issues.   The stories about greed and insensitivity in corporate America make the headlines, but I keep running into managers and executives who are worried about their people, who fight to protect their jobs, who take pay cuts so that others have more, and who see their job is easing the psychological and objective pain suffered by those they work with and their families. I also see it in politics.  The crisis seems to be bringing out the best in both U.S. parties. My sense is that ideological battles and raw self-interest (although they still are present) are simply far less acceptable than in the past, and that people are trying to pull together to fix things so that everyone benefits.  Sure, there is the usual finger-pointing and some evidence of greed, but a lot more energy is being devoted in positive directions than I can ever recall.

I have written about and reprinted a touching Kurt Vonnegut poem here and talked how kind he was to let me reprint it in The No Asshole Rule. It is called Joe Heller.  The main theme is that the knowledge that "I have enough"  can be a source of good mental health, and I would add, can lead to more constructive and generous relationships with other people.  Although nearly all of us who have enough have lost a lot of money this year, I don't actually know anyone who has complained bitterly about it. Doing so is just is not cool, as whining about it is selfish given that so many people who don't have enough have lost so much. Here is the poem, which strikes me as especially appropriate for the times.  It is one of the last things that Vonnegut wrote before he died.

Joe Heller  

True story, Word of Honor:
Joseph Heller, an important and funny writer
now dead,
and I were at a party given by a billionaire
on Shelter Island.

I said, "Joe, how does it make you feel
to know that our host only yesterday
may have made more money
than your novel 'Catch-22'
has earned in its entire history?"
And Joe said, "I've got something he can never have."
And I said, "What on earth could that be, Joe?"
And Joe said, "The knowledge that I've got enough."
Not bad! Rest in peace!"

–Kurt Vonnegut

The New Yorker,
May 16^th, 2005

There is interesting research by Stanford's Dale Miller and others showing that unbridled self-interest is not the natural human condition; rather being selfish versus altruistic are behaviors that can be prompted by the way that we frame a particular problem or choice or by the behavior of people around us.  In other words, being greedy and selfish are social norms that are provoked or suppressed in most human beings by different conditions.  A silver lining of these dark times is that greed is seen as bad behavior and doing things for the common good is seen as, well, good behavior.

P.S. You can read Dale's paper on "The Norm of Self-Interest" here. It is more accessible than most academic papers and an evidence-based challenge to the assumptions made by many economists.

I try to avoid politics on this blog for the most part as I find that the subject often provokes too much emotion and too little cognition. And I also should point out that most authors and professors (and I qualify on both counts) suffer from the delusion that their pet theories drive all meaningful behavior.  So I hope that you will forgive me for committing both sins here — I promise not to do this too often.  But I can't resist pointing out that there was an article published in Politico last April called "Obama Team Remains Unshaken" that discussed how the Obama campaign dealt with their New Hampshire loss (and other setbacks) with unusual calm and a surprising lack of finger-pointing within the campaign.

Here is The No Asshole Rule part.  At one point in the article, it describes a conversation between chief strategist David Axelrod and Jim Margolis, who eventually became a media consultant to the campaign, but was hesitating to sign up because he had such tough time within the rather nasty Kerry campaign in 2004.  Axelrod argued that things were different in the Obama campaign, that "There are no assholes,” Axelrod responded. “There are going to be no assholes on this campaign.”

Of course, this quote warms my heart and I have added this example to my honor roll of places and people that apply the no asshole rule. At the same time, I respect those who may see the campaign differently and I  want to emphasize that I realize that a lot of other factors went into the victory — and the rule at best played a small role.

P.S. Thanks to Craig Silverman who writes The Office Blog for The Globe and Mail.  He emailed me about this recent New Yorker article on the Obama campaign and suggested that the no asshole rule appeared to be one of the themes in the story. As has been widely reported, the catchphrase within the campaign was "no drama with Obama."

My last post asked if anyone could confirm that Charlie Munger had said that Berkshire Hathaway applied The No Asshole Rule from early on.  I am delighted to report that, thanks to Bill's comment, I now know that it comes from an interview with Charlie Munger that is quoted on page 388 of Snowball, Alice Schroder's current bestseller on Warren Buffett.   I had started reading the book, but had not got that far!

The quote comes at the bottom of page 388 and the context is that they had bought 20% of a troubled investment firm called Source Capital at a discount from "two assholes who were the sellers," but then they started packing the board with talented managers who were not assholes.  Munger's quote is, to confirm,  "We had the no asshole rule very early. Our basic rule is that we don't deal with assholes."

A few comments:

First, as I have said from the start, I did not invent the no asshole rule.  It has been around for a long time, The book — and this blog — simply meant report how it is used in different settings, provide evidence to show why it assholes are so damaging, and to show that it is possible to be successful in business and still apply the rule.  I am especially delighted to hear that Buffett and Munger — two of the most successful capitalists of our time — have used it for years.

Second, note that Munger and Buffett use the word asshole — not something else.  I know it offends some people, but no other word carries the right cultural meaning for me –and a lot of other people.  "Jerk" or "bully" just wouldn't do in this case.

Third, reading this quote in context is interesting because, in making this investment, Munger and Buffett realized that they were in fact violating their own rules. When he heard about Source Capital, Buffett joked "Now I understand the two-asshole exception to the no-asshole rule."  My take on this is that, in business and in life, there are times when for practical reasons of all kinds, your will end-up violating the no asshole rule.  The question, however, is what happens during and after the transgression.  If you do it knowingly and believe that it is worth dealing with assholes to get something you want or need, there might be times when it is worth making a deal with one of these devils — so long as you don't become one yourself. Indeed, such self-knowledge alone can help you resist catching the asshole poisoning from them.  Moreover, in some cases, such knowledge can put you in position to reverse the nastiness down the line — in this case Munger put talented and civilized managers on the board to offset those two creeps.

Finally, to rain on my own parade a bit here, although companies in Berkshire Hathaway portfolio are generally well-managed, it is unreasonable to believe that all of these companies have and enforce the no asshole rule. Note the comment on my prior post from "Living with an asshole" that makes this point.

Thanks again to Bill. And now I can add Berkshire Hathaway to my Honor Roll of people and places that enforce the no asshole rule.

If you are a regular reader of this blog, you know that I maintain an "honor roll" of organizations that espouse and apply The No Asshole Rule.  I was pointed to this quote in a corner of the web I can't identify from Charlie Munger, who is Warren Buffet's right-hand man and Vice-Chairman of the renowned Berkshire Hathaway.  I found it here, and it is "We had a no-asshole rule very early.  Our basic rule has always been that we won’t deal with assholes."  I would love to add Berkshire Hathaway to my honor roll, but as there is no source given for this quote, I don't know if it is legitimate or not.  If anyone knows the source or has ideas about how to find it, I would be appreciate it.  Thanks.

Also, more generally, I am always looking for more organizations and groups to add to the honor roll, so if you know one — or are part of one — please drop me a note.

P.S. I have started reading The Snowball: Warren Buffett and The Business of Life. I have given up looking for direct evidence of the rule in the book but am enjoying it a great deal — Buffett has had quite a life. 

I just got a note from Emily at Electric Pulp reporting that the Asshole Rating Self-Exam (or ARSE) has recently passed 170,000 completions, 172,528 to be exact.   This is a self-test you can take to determine if you are a certified asshole — it is in The No Asshole Rule and we published it on Guy Kawsaski's blog when the book first came out.  A sample question is "You sometimes just contain your contempt toward the jerks and losers in your workplace."

Emily also reports that the Asshole Client from Hell Exam (or ACHE) is up to 13,027 completions — a quiz to help determine if your client is a certified asshole, which I explain in more detail here.  Sample questions include  "Life is one emergency after another with these people" and "They treat me like shit."  Also, I just couldn't resist putting up the button again, it is so on target.

I got an inspiring and fascinating email last week from an HR manager at start-up who is working like crazy to build a great culture. See below. She asked if I had any ideas about how to build and sustain a great culture, and I offered some bits of advice, emphasizing that having written values is one step (like SuccessFactors Rules of Engagement, similar to her Declaration of Commitment) but that having senior managers who live the desired values is what really counts.  I also pointed her to my "Honor Roll" of places that use The No Asshole Rule.  And I think she is perfect candidate for Guy Kawasaki's new book. But I think she could use deeper and wiser advice, so please jump in and help her, as I love both her energy and her goals!  Here is her note (with a few minor changes, to protect both the innocent and the guilty):

Dear Bob,

I
have been a huge fan of the No Asshole movement since I first read about it
over a year ago.  At the time, I was an HR Generalist at
manufacturing company.  I passed around a few articles on the subject to
our management team and everyone was impressed!  They all agreed, how nice
it would be to have such a policy… they also agreed that there was no way it
would work!  They said we would have to fire at least half of our
employees, especially management!  Oddly, they didn’t see the problem with
that… I did. Months later, I was given my performance review. My boss gave me
a glowing review, he explained how I had exceeded his expectations, how he
really appreciated me, how I had gained everyone’s trust… and how I wasn’t
going to get the promotion to HR Manager because I was a woman in the
industry.

I quickly updated my resume and had an interview the next
week.During my interview with the new company, I shared with them my desire to
have a no jerks policy and to promote trust within the organization.  I
knew it was risky, but I was tired of working with jerks!  To my surprise,
they didn’t think I was crazy!  I was hired as the HR Manager,
the first 10 employees of the company.  I was given a laptop, a phone, a pen
and a clean slate. Unfortunately, over the past 6 months and one 12+ hour day
after another, I haven’t had much time to work on my No Jerks policy.  We
did come up with an initial list of 10 statements “the Declaration of
Commitment” to help drive our culture very early in the game and have been
sharing it with all new hires.  I can’t tell you how excited everyone is
about the D.O.C..

But,
as probably typical with a startup (not that I want to be
typical), a great deal of work must get done with limited staffing and
tremendous growth going on… we're pulling away from our ideals.  I’m
worried that our core values are getting lost in the chaos and I want to get us
back on the right track.  I need to write out a strategy for supporting
these values throughout the organization and I'm looking for a good place to
start.

We
hand-picked an incredible workforce and I don’t want to let them down.  Do
you have any suggestions or advice for me?  I would appreciate any
input you are willing to share!

Please help this HR manager. The early days of a start-up are a crazy time, but it is also the critical period when an organization's culture is born, and for better worse, expectations and traditions that are set at the outset are very difficult to change later.