Author: supermoxie

Guy Kawasaki and I put out some tools last year to help people figure-out of they are certified assholes or are considering going to work for one.  The ARSE, or Asshole Rating Self-Exam, has been completed by over 130,000 people.  We also developed the Asshole Boss Detection System with folks from Linked-in, a set of questions you can ask about your future boss behind his or back (just as they checking your references) to find out if, in fact, the person you are considering working for is a certified asshole.

In this spirit, there have been a number of articles recently about how to tell if you work for a bad boss. On January 8th, The New York Times ran article called "Good Boss, Bad Boss, Which Are You."

Here is an excerpt:

To find out how good — or bad — a boss you are, the National
Federation of Independent Business, a small business advocacy group,
suggests asking yourself these questions:

1. Have you ever publicly criticized an employee?

2. Do you take credit for your employees’ work?

3. Do your employees fear you?

4. Do you expect employees to do what you tell them without question?

5. Do you believe employees should know what to do without you telling them or providing guidelines?

6. Are you a yeller?

7. Do you demean employees as a form of punishment?

8. Do you play favorites?

9. Do you hate delegating?

10. Do you check everyone’s work?

According to the answer key, the more “yes” answers, the greater the likelihood you are a bad boss.

In addition, the article refers to a recent story by INC’s Leigh Buchanan (who also wrote about The No Asshole Rule in a funny article called "The Bully Rulebook.") Here is one sign of bad boss, according to Leigh: “You never see people walk by. Employees would rather circumnavigate
the entire office to get to the coffee machine or bathroom than take
the shortcut past your door and risk being invited in.”

These surveys aren’t just fun. To me, the fact that people are writing about them is a good sign because it just might help drive incompetent and nasty bosses out of the workplace — in part, by helping bad bosses realize what they are doing wrong so they can change their ways.

P.S. The first graphic is an eraser that my publisher used to promote The No Asshole Rule. The second graphic is from the INC story.

At various times, I’ve been tempted to set-up ways so that The No Asshole Rule can be sent as a gift (sometimes anonymously and sometimes not) to send a not-so-subtle message to an asshole boss or co-worker.   I’ve always resisted the temptation, in part, because I worried that if people are already assholes, getting the gift might cause them to go after the messenger, rather than to take it is a sign that they or their organization could be infected with asshole poisoning.  Indeed, research on whistleblowers confirms this "shoot the messenger effect."  I got a hint of this risk some months back, when a woman wrote me that her asshole boss saw the book on her desk, and told her to take it home.  But I was quite dismayed to receive this email today (I print it as it was sent, but have removed some identifying information):

Dear
Bob,

I bought a copy of The No Asshole
Rule at an airport during a business trip. Reading the book, I figured out
without doubt that I was a victim.

Since being nominated for a new
role, I was reporting temporarily to my tormentor’s boss. He is one of the most
senior human resources executives within a large bank. Following more foul play from his direct report, and
others, I decided to give him your book in the first edition version for
Christmas. In my card, I wrote that I would like to speak to him about similar
phenomena as depicted in your book within the context of our human resources
department.

He had me fired on the first working
day of 2008 (a week ago) – without even getting the opportunity to talk. I am
now in negotiations regarding the terms of my exit – and looking forward to a
new and less asshole ridden life.

Alas, I feel compelled to post this email as a warning to others; indeed, it seems that giving some assholes the book as a gift is dangerous because it turns them into even more flaming assholes.

1.
The McKinsey Quarterly announced that
my article based on The No Asshole Rule was their most popular article in 2007
(I think this means it was the most downloaded). It is a somewhat censored version, called
“Building the Civilized Workplace.” You
can go here to get the article (registration is free). The Quarterly has very wide distribution and
is read by many people who have the influence to actually implement the rule,
so I am delighted that the message is being heard by their clients as well as
within McKinsey, because they have so much influence over senior executives of
large organizations throughout the world. Here are there top 5 articles for 2007:

1. Building the civilized workplace

2. How businesses are using Web 2.0: A McKinsey Global
Survey

3. The CEO’s role in leading transformation

4. The halo effect, and other managerial delusions

5. Investing in sustainability: An interview with Al Gore
and David Blood

2. Fast Company announced their list of
the top 10 business books of the year, and I was happy to see that, in addition
to The No Asshole Rule, Chip and Dan
Heath’s Made to Stick was on the list as well. As I have written here many
times before, if there ever was a book that deserved the label “instant
classic,” Made to Stick is it.

3.
The India Times, which they tell me is one of the leading newspaper in India,
also named The No Asshole as one of their top 10 business books of the
year. I can’t find the URL but here is a pdf:

Download times_managing_25_dec_2007_best_business_books.pdf

4.The
Russian version is about to appear. I have no idea what the above cover says,
but it sure is wild.

5. As I blogged about a few weeks ago, the new issue of the complete lawyer will be on workplace bullies. But you can get the articles already, as
Victoria Pynchon tells us on her
blog. Victoria’s article is stunning, scary, brave, and remarkably
insightful. Perhaps the most honest and
compelling piece I’ve ever read about how the pressures that lawyers face can
provoke asshole poisioning. Check it out, here is how Victoria describes it:

“My article Why
Lawyers Are Unhappy… And Make Others Unhappy, Too is a
personal confessional of workplace misbehavior. In fact, it’s just about
as personal as you can get without committing professional suicide.
But hey!  Somebody had
to fess up and when you’re  the
jerk in the workplace, it’s you who
is usually the last to
know.  As my regular readers know, however, there is a happy ending to
this one.” 

6.
Indeed, if you want some brand new evidence about why lawyers are so uptight,
check out this story about the lawyers from Morrison & Forester (aka MoFo) who cost their client 1 million dollars
for filing some papers 1 minute late. (I
suspect that the firm will be paying, not their clients). See this WSJ
story. I also think it is
interesting that the MoFo lawyers aren’t getting much sympathy from some of the
commentors.

7.
I have also had readers point me to some interesting stories in the media about
workplace assholes, including one on called “Easing Angst”
in Business Today (published in
India), a well-crafted story by Jane Leder (who interviewed me months ago) in
North Shore Magazine called Emergency
Exit, a story in Voir
about the French Canadian version of the No Asshole Rule, Objectif
Zéro Chien Sale (which means, roughly, “no more dirty dogs”).  Finally, The New York Post listed The No Asshole Rule as one of their  notable books of 2007, but were careful to say that they weren’t all good books.  I am not quite sure how to take that!

More
is happening. In particular, I am developing a version of the ARSE (Asshole
Rating Self-Exam) that will be used to assess if, in fact, the client you are
working for is a certified asshole. If
you have any ideas about sure signs that a client is, or is going to become, an
asshole, please let me know.

I’ve
always liked the tradition of using this time of year as a chance to reflect. For me, this was the
year of The No Asshole Rule, so I
will devote this post to that one and the next other topics.  I never expected so many people to buy this
little book about workplace assholes in the United
States, let alone in France,
Germany,
and Italy;
and I was shocked when it won the Quill Award. And the rate at which related stories,
research, and “asshole management” methods were sent to me – and are sent to me
now – still astounds me.

It is hard to
pick my favorite “asshole-related moments,” but I will try.  I am also weaving in some of my favorite  pictures. The one at the top is from The New York Post (which published a series of related
stories) and the cry baby bully is from a Reuters story.

1.
I never expected over 130,000 people to complete the ARSE (Asshole-Rating Self
Exam). A big part of the reason is Guy Kawasaki’s magical touch. The
stories that people tell me about the ARSE are sometimes funny, and other
times, kind of scary. Like this one about the guy who quite his job right after
completing it for his VP,
who scored 23 out of 24. I also enjoyed playing with some other web toys,
including ARSEmail and the Flying ARSE, and although about 10,000
people have completed each, neither has quite touched a nerve in the same way
as the original ARSE. Stay tuned, early
next year, we will have a new web toy, to help you assess if you have a client
from hell (or if you are one).  Also, the picture of the bully is by Lisa Haney.  

2.
I received a lot of ideas from readers and fellow bloggers who helped me develop
and keep refining a set of tips
for surviving workplace assholes. I especially want to thank the government
worker who showed us the power of keeping “asshole
diaries” to document the behavior of the local bully, and was able to
triumph in large part because she was able to recruit several others oppressed
co-workers to do the same, and then present the evidence to their supervisor.
It reminded me of Arlo Guthrie’s old song Alice’s
Restaurant; if one person tries to fight back, the organization treats you
like you are nuts; if a whole bunch fight back together, then the chances that
you will be taken seriously are a lot higher. And pretty much the same point is supported by Professor Pamela Lutgen-Sandvik’s research on
fighting back against bullies. (The graphic is from a Value Rich story, which contained pictures designed to be inserted into various pages of The No Asshole Rule; this one is supposed to go on page 119). 

3. I received many emails
and wrote many posts from people who complained about being oppressed by
assholes, and certainly, as this survey and especially this survey show, there
are a lot of assholes out there, and a growing body of research documents the
damage done. But a point that sometimes gets lost is that any of us, under the
wrong conditions, can turn into at least temporary assholes. Indeed, one of the
last points of the book is that “assholes are use.”  This is one of the main implications of
research on power, as I wrote about here. And see this the post here to see why there is the strange picture of the guy with an "E" drawn on his head both backwards and forwards below. 

I also learned a lot from the over 350 answers
and comments in response to my question on
the Linked-in blog: " As people become more powerful, there’s a tendency
for bad behavior to surface. What suggestions do you have for leaders to avoid
becoming a jerk in the face of rising pressure and demands?"    But I
thought that the most insightful comment on the challenges of keeping one’s inner jerk in check was David
Maister’s list of “I’ve been an asshole when.” I applaud David’s honesty and courage.  For better or worse, the things on David’s
list apply to me pretty well too:

I got overexcited and overenthused on a topic (I lose my sense of proportion , just keep trying to make my point and don’t let people finish their sentences).
I got tired.
Three things went wrong in a row. Two I can handle, but make it three and I lose it.

I was asked to do more than one thing at a time. I’m not a multitasker, and I get cranky when people interrupt my concentration.

Igot criticized too directly (I reacted badly).
I felt like I’m not being treated with respect.
I was trying too hard to ‘show off.

4. There were some pretty
funny moments too. Like the brilliant letter
to the San Francisco Chronicle complaining about the title of my book. Or Mark
Fortier’s style guide for people in the media who interview me, but are squeamish
about the title. Or the picture to the left from Value Rich that illustrates how assholes breed like rabbits (It is supposed to be inserted on page 66). And the post about the day that the The No Asshole Rule was used in the bible
studies class, I confess, struck me as funny at first, until I realized how
serious and wise Richard Beck’s application of the ideas were (see my last
post for more). But the one that made me laugh the hardest was probably the “lovely
moment in the MBA classroom,” passed along by C.K. Gunsalus. Here is the key part:

We had a lovely moment in class today you might
appreciate.  We had a guest speaker, who had scanned the syllabus upon
arriving in the classroom. The speaker said, at one point, something along the lines of "I see you’re
reading a book by Bob Sutton with a word in the title I simply detest." An unidentified student in the back of the room (there are more than 100 people
in this class) yelled out:
"Yeah, I hate the word
‘rule’, too,"

5.
Perhaps the most heartening thing I learned was how many organizations were
already using The No Asshole Rule, or
similar rules. The "no assholes rule at SuccessFactors got the
most attention (You can read about in the
McKinsey Quarterly, hear about it on KFOG, or see it on MSNBC). I also liked the The
No Dickhead Rule at Arup and Lou Pepper’s story about how the applied the
rule during the years he was CEO of Washington Mutual – you can read about
these and other examples of places with the rule here.  And I was also heartened by the dozens of people who told me that the book
helped give them courage to quit a job where they had a vile boss or
co-workers.  I wrote the book to encourage organizations to treat people in more civilized ways and to
encourage people who are trapped in nasty workplaces to fight back effectively, and failing
that, find ways to get out if they possibly can.

Finally,
I would like to give special thanks to fellow bloggers who wrote such supportive
things about the book during the past year or so, and sent me so many warm and constructive notes that usually didn’t appear on this blog, but helped my a great deal  Please forgive me if I have left
you out, I am trying to remember as well as I can. This is a very incomplete list, hundreds of other bloggers have helped me who aren’t mentioned). These include:

Diego
at Metacool

Guy at Change
the World

Krishna
at Thought Clusters

Gretchen
at the Happiness Project

Jeff
at Management By Baseball

Pam
at Escape from Cubicle Nation

Frank
over at KnowHR

Maureen
at Pink Slip

Kent
Blumberg

Polly LaBarre at Mavericks

Julie
at Life-At-The Bar

David
Maister

Sig
at Thingamy

Alexander
at the Chief Happiness Officer

Todd at 800
CEO-Read

The
Jackson Library Blog

Lisa at
the Time Magazine Blog

Loren
at the Busybody

IL Metodo Antistronzi (Italian
Edition Blog)

Chuck
at Third Wave

Don
at Audiobook Maven

Objectif Zero Sale Con  (French Edition Blog)

Brayden
at Org.theory.net

I
could go on and on, an again, I am sorry
to those I’ve left out. I appreciate the
support from everyone, and the criticisms too. On to 2008!

P.S. The picture above of a dead fish on a keyboard is from a story about the book in a German magazine gets my vote for the weirdest of them all. 

A lot of surprising things happened in response to the publication of The No Asshole Rule. I am putting together a post or two about some of the highlights and biggest lessons that I learned this year.  But perhaps nothing surprised me, or forced me to open my mind more, than experimental psychologist Richard Beck’s use of The No Asshole Rule in a bible studies class in Texas, which he wrote about on his blog Experimental Theology.  Here is Richard’s retrospective on this experience, which is part of his  post on the Best of 2007. I find his comment wonderful and deeply constructive in many ways, and very much in the Christmas spirit:

#7
My Bible Class about Bob Sutton’s Book
No retrospective on 2007 would be complete without facing up to my Most
Controversial Post of the Year. I did a bible class at my church on Dr.
Sutton’s book and then followed that post up with a series. That post was
picked up on by Dr. Sutton (initially
here on his personal blog and then later in The Huffington Post
where he mentions his changing attitudes about Christians in two features found here and here.
Which pleases me in that, if you look at his remarks, it seems I helped
dismantle some stereotypes about Christians and Christian intellectuals.

These gains aside however, because I didn’t euphemize and took Dr. Sutton’s
language as-is (following the lead, as a scholar would, of the Harvard
Business Review who first published Dr. Sutton’s idea), some conservative
readers have been offended and have written my employer about my Christian
commitment. The disappointing part for me is that none of these complaints have
been taken directly to me per Jesus’ instructions in the Sermon on the Mount.
Which means that the complaints are not Christian, honest, and truth-seeking in
intent. They are, rather, attempts to use my post as a political tool against
my university. Which is sad. To those offended by this blog, please e-mail me
directly for conversation. Also note that my discussion of Dr. Sutton’s book
had nothing to do with my university as it was a bible class for my church,
populated with adults and not college students. Thus, if you have any spiritual
concerns with me on this topic please contact my spiritual overseers, the
elders of the Highland Church of
Christ. They are the ones accountable for both my spiritual journey as well
as any teaching conducted under their oversight.

As a final thought on this subject, a part of the reason (other than its clear
gospel message) I took up Dr. Sutton’s book was to explore what "Christian
language" can and should look like. What are the discernment issues
involved? How do we adjudicate? Is propriety and politeness the main concern?
But what if, as Dr. Sutton’s book shows, cultural mores are changing? Is this a
generational issue? If so, should language change to connect with the young
even if the older (and most established in faith) are offended? These are
challenging and important issues. How shall we speak to our world? Is the world
a homogenous crowd allowing only a single form of Christian discourse? Or is
the world heterogeneous, diverse, and ramified, requiring multiple languages
each unique given context and audience? In short, all readers here–offended or
not offended–should pitch in and discuss rather than gripe and
complain. There is work to be done for the Kingdom! Let’s find out how best to
do it and support each other in a process–being in but not of the world–that
necessarily creates different modes of missional living.

Richard, thank you so much for being so thoughtful and open-minded.  I especially like your call for constructive discussion and argument — it reminds me of one on of my favorite sayings by fellow psychologist Karl Weick: Fight as if you are right, listen as if you are wrong!

I got this scary and
insightful email earlier in the week. I
am often asked if The No
Asshole Rule applies in other cultures. The reactions that I’ve received from
Europe (especially France, Italy, Germany, and the UK), as well as from India,  suggest that the ideas do transfer to at least some cultures. But I have been less sure about Asian countries, so
this note is particularly interesting. It sounds like, at least in some corners of Japanese business, the ideas strike a nerve.

I would be especially
interested to hear comments from other people who work in Japan, or who have
extensive experience with Japanese companies or business people. Here goes:   

Dear Bob,

I am a Tokyo-based HR consultant and executive coach.

I became aware of the NAR in Feb/07, and received my copy from
Amazon in March. I read it cover to cover in one sitting, and
ordered copies for my friends, mostly HR directors and talent
managers occupying seats in foreign-owned MNC’s. I ‘leaf’ a lot of
business books, we all do, but NEVER have I seen a book capture the
popular imagination as did and does the NAR. For the first time, in a
longtime, we ‘laughed’. After we laughed, we experienced an
added catharsis in sharing tales of AH behavior (individual and organizational).
And, this would be AH behavior of a particularly virulent form, what
happens when:  Western managers bring a simplistic and short-term
perspective to complex business and cultural challenges; Japanese managers
utilize ‘ijime’ (bullying) to effect restructuring that would be proscribed by
a labor code that is very protective of worker rights.

I scrolled through reader messages on your blog, and tragic as
many of these stories are, I could not find one that compares to the
image of a Japanese manager hanging dead in the company stairwell,
his final message to his AH boss. (That boss popped up on my
screen again recently with regard to another incident in another
company.) I could tick off dozens of these stories; a few end in death; a
significant number end in long-term depression leaves, derailed careers,
derailed lives.

The ‘treatment’ of workplace depression, what I now call,
‘Asshole Toxic Shock Syndrome’ (AHTSS) is big business in Japan. I think this
is opportunistic and ‘bad’ business: opportunistic because it does not address
the problem, but shifts the focus to treatment of its ‘victims’;
bad because Japan is talent-starved, and its organizations need to retain
and develop every warm body they can get their hands on. Under ‘bad’ I would also subsume diversity,
inclusion and other ‘why can’t we all just get along’ initiatives that spill
forth from the U.S. It seems to me the
better question is:

“Why can’t we ensure civility in the workplace? Why are Japanese streets the safest in the
world, and its work environments becoming some of the more lethal?”

I began experimenting with the NAR as part of my coaching
practice, and thus far, have found two applications:

1) To assist clients suffering from ‘AHTSS’ to understand that
it is ‘not them’. One such client,
a particularly plucky soul, bought a dozen copies and seeded them
throughout her organization. She, an expatriate
manager leading a multi-cultural team in a European MNC, reported that the NAR
transcends culture, was an ‘idea’ the diverse constituents of her team could
readily agree upon. And, this took the NAR into the realm of OD. That the book
is written in simple language, absent jargon, and printed in a large typeface
means Japanese and other ESL folks can read it too. You book gained greater organizational access
than any consultant could.

2) To treat AH behavior, ’cause wouldn’t you bet my coaching
practice is full of ‘0-empathy technocrats’ who are challenged to manage
other human beings.  I have explored this application VERY
tentatively, as one would. I am
pleased to report that by calling a spade a spade, as in "[Client], you
are a very talented fellow, but your AH behavior is undermining your ability to
get things done" has wrought miracles. When I stopped equivocating, they started listening! And, a few have taken the NAR to heart and
are practicing.

The NAR has transformed my practice, and convinced me that
seemingly intractable problems are amenable to common sense solutions.

Again,
I invite comments. It also sounds like
this HR consultant is employing some of the techniques suggested in Crucial
Conversations and Taming
the Abrasive Manager, both excellent books.